1. When I want investment advice, I get it from:
a) The Stock Market Guide to Profitable Investments
b) The Wall Street Journal
c) Complete strangers I run into at the video store.
2. When I wake up in the morning, I:
b) Get dressed.
c) Lift my head off the keyboard and start shorting drug stocks.
3. In order to trade stocks intelligently, one must have a:
4. The last book I read was:
a) Madame Bovary.
b) The Stock Market Guide to Profitable Investments
c) Windows 2000 for Dummies.
5. I go to the doctor:
a) Once a year.
b) Once every two years.
c) When I put my fist through the screen.
6. “TCS” is a company that manufactures:
c) I have no idea, but I just bought two hundred shares.
7. When I am in a bar and meet a beautiful woman/man who seems to be attracted to me, the first thing I look at is:
a) Her/his face.
b) Her/his body.
8. “Beating the spread” refers to:
a) The way whipped cream cheese is made.
b) The way Honduran peasant women clean their bed coverings.
c) Don’t know/care.
9. “P/E ratio” means:
a) Something to do with, like, stocks and junk like that.
b) The number of times per hour that a day trader has to use the bathroom.
c) Like I care?
10. A “tick” is:
a) A nervous syndrome common to day traders.
b) Something that often lives in a day trader’s hair.
c) These questions are really starting to make me mad, dude!
If you answered (c) to any of the above questions …
You do have what it takes to succeed in the fast-paced, action-packed world of the day traders!